What would your epithet be?
Anytime I’m driving around in my car, it’s practically certain that I’m listening to one of three things: my i-pod, myself cursing the hell that is LA traffic, or NPR (although, the second comes and goes sporadically on a daily basis). NPR - specifically KPCC in my neck of the woods - is the most thought provoking of all my choices. For those of you who are quick to categorize public radio as boring or stuffy, well….Pffft!
On this night, my friend Patt Morrison (and I use the term “friend” loosely here) interviewed the editors, Rachel Fershleiser and Larry Smith, who recently published a collection of autobiographies contributed by some famous and not-so-famous scribes of our time. Entitled: Not Quite What I Was Planning: And Other Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Obscure, this comparatively smaller volume sums up in six words what could otherwise be said in 600 pages. Take for example this personal narrative, which Rachel was quoting when I first tuned in: “After Harvard, had baby with crackhead.” Wow….That’s a story.
So, as I sat behind the wheel listening to the conversation, my eyes lit up and I squealed with excitement to myself (which was a nice change from the usual eruption of nastiness that goes along with driving), “I want to play!” Instantly, I was scrambling to figure out the six words that could best describe me, unfortunately, I drew a blank. I couldn’t think of anything I felt that was important enough to spend six words describing. I was trying too hard to be clever (which, as I see those six words now, they kinda fit - go figure), so instead, I tried simplifying things and chose one word that would allow people to instantly understand my legacy. It hit me: “Pragmatic; did I spell that right?” Yep, that’s me all right, or at the least the version of me that sticks out in my mind - rational & realistic, down-to-earth, stubborn, habitually abysmal speller, ceaselessly second guessing myself - and yes, after coming up with the one word, the other five spontaneously followed, so I accepted the natural thought process as pinning me best.
But why was it so hard to think of just six little words, when, in my mind, I’ve already had all these great experiences that have cultivated my wisdom and philosophy on life. What do I want to say about myself; what’s the turning point in my life that has made me who I am today? Possibly, I just haven’t lived enough to know, or maybe I’ll never pinpoint it to one specific incident, but rather gradually I’ll creep into this epiphany of self-realization. So let me back it up a little bit and bring it to the table discussion: If you had to describe your life story, your legacy, as it were, what would you capture? As one fella wrote in: “I like big butts, can’t lie.” There you have it.
The writers of this compilation accredit the idea to Hemingway, who allegedly accepted a challenge of creating a story in six words. He considered the result one of his best pieces: “For sale: baby shoes, never worn”. Immediately, my mind begins developing the saga of a family’s loss. The power of this anecdote is in the vague brevity that allows the reader’s creativity to fill in the lines. The message is quick, clear, punchy; it doesn’t take much effort on the reader’s part to absorb the message, but the effect surprisingly lingers.
There are equally striking messages within the book, which contains close to 1000 entries, and there are also apparent similarities among themes and tones. Many people saw regret in their life’s story: “Should have risked asking, he sighed” - a missed opportunity - “Should have used condom that time” - a bad decision. Some saw their disappointment with a lighter attitude: “The psychic said I’d be richer” or “Happiest when ignoring huge financial debt.” With such limited restrictions, word choice and arrangement are everything. Also with the printed work, the presentation and punctuation suggest connotations, or perhaps represent aspects of the writer’s life. With the entry: “Aspiring lady pirate, disillusioned, sells boat” the pauses indicated by the comas represent passing time in the writer’s life, as if each phrase were a different interval, displayed here in chronological order. Here: “A crush on Susan Sarandon. Unrequited” the period shows a long passing of time, maybe years full of lustful feeling towards the actress. Every re-read of each phrase brings to light a fresh perspective on the individual, and yet there’s a familiarity as though you’ve known this person, or more so someone like them, at some point. The packaging always differs slightly, though, which is why you can say life is still worth living…
These mini-biographies are addictive and intriguing, appealing to a mish-mash of emotions and recalling to the reader an understanding through parallel experiences. Although, to contradict myself, there are entries bleeding with pain and all I do is empathize. “She said nothing could go wrong.” This quote is full of implications that I can only begin to imagine, whereas: “Girlfriend is pregnant, my husband said” sounds pretty straightforward, but nonetheless - damn, that sucks. Above all, there are a few that hit full frontal as though a semi just plowed over you: “Everyone who loved me is dead.” Many people fear death and loneliness, but this is a person who’s living it. No one wants to feel abandoned or alone, stranded. I believe, too, that in some capacity everyone wants to be accepted and loved. “Does my biological mother cry sometimes?” Here is an innocent bystander, in an uncontrollable situation, that can’t forget the betrayal that began at birth. Perhaps I’m wrong, but it seems as though the bitterness is hindering their growth. That’s pretty heavy.
I won’t go into detail how I feel about each one that specifically caught my eye, but I list some favorites here in hopes that they pull at you in some way as they did at me:
“Realized childhood dream doesn’t pay bills.”
“I’m not afraid of anything anymore.”
“Fourteen years old, story still untold.”
“Bad breaks discovered at high speeds.”
“The shit invariably hits the fan.”
“I was born some assembly required.”
“Anything’s possible with an extension cord.”
“Found true love, married someone else.”
“Happiness is a warm salami sandwich.”
“Love annihilated a 30-year age difference.”
“What the hell. Might as well.”
“Won the fight; lost the girl.”
“Afraid of becoming like my mother.”
There you go, some insight provided by me, inspired by NPR. So, now it’s your turn. Who are you and what’s important in your world. You have 6 words and a lifetime to decide. Ready…set…Go!
March 25th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
I eliminated self doubt. I think.